One in three people born in the UK today will develop dementia in their lifetime.

Statistics from leading charity, Alzheimer’s Society, show that around a million people in the UK have a form of dementia. And numbers are expected to rise to 1.4 million people by 2040.

This week – 19 – 25 May – is Dementia Action Week and charities across the UK are highlighting the importance of early diagnosis for people affected by dementia and encouraging families to get support.

Julia Martos, a regular at our community hub at Grantchester in South Cambridgeshire, cared for her late husband for 10 years. He was diagnosed at the age of 66 with vascular dementia and later with Alzheimer’s. He passed away 12 years ago.
Over the years, she has worked as a volunteer with people with dementia and their carers throughout Almeria in her native Spain, as well as in Cambridgeshire.

Here, her local work has included supporting County Council training teams and NHS mental health teams delivering awareness sessions to a huge range of people including support workers at day centres and care homes, private carers, voluntary workers and independent providers.

She shared her many real-life stories and experiences of living with dementia and Alzheimer’s and what she learned from her own journey as a carer.

Julia also kept a diary during her decade of care and printed copies to share with health and care professionals – including hospital consultants – so they understood the impact on families and the importance of good care.

 

Julia says:

“You need to offer just two things to look after someone with dementia: love and security. We were married for 40 years. But I nearly divorced my husband at the start because his change was so drastic. We had moved back to Spain but it was so difficult, he was always angry and shouting and he didn’t want to see a doctor. Eventually he agreed and he went on to be diagnosed with vascular dementia. At the time, I knew nothing about dementia or how to give people the right care. So I learned as much as I could. But my husband became my teacher – he taught me how to care for him.”

 

Julia’s top tips for family carers

1. Learn as much as you can about dementia and its symptoms.
2. Keep respectful of your loved one with dementia. They are not stupid. They are lost.
3. Don’t force people to do things. If you feel you are losing patience, walking into another room can diffuse a fraught situation.
4. Check they are not in pain. They may have difficulty telling you about it verbally and it could go unrecognised and untreated. So look for behavioural changes, facial expressions and body language.
5. Hold their hands. Human touch is vital and helps people with dementia feel more secure.
6. Make sure you ask for help and take a break so that you can keep on caring. Caring 24/7 is impossible.

 

A poem by Julia

Do not ask me to remember
Not try to make me understand
Let me rest
Let me know that you are with me
Hug me and take my hand
I’m sad, sick and lost
Everything I know
Is that I need you
Never lose patience with me
Do not swear, do not cry, do not shout

Cannot do anything with what happens to me
Even if I try to be different
Cannot recall
Remember that I need you
The best of me already departed
Do not forsake me, stay beside me
Love me, until the end of my life.

 

Help for people with dementia and their carers

If you need information or support, please get in touch. Our 40 community hubs and team of Village Agents across East Cambridgeshire, South Cambridgeshire and Fenland can help you with information and put you in touch with support organisations and health, care and wellbeing services in your area.

We can signpost you to support sessions, emergency planning, dementia and memory cafes, art and singing groups, exercise groups and more. Call us on 01353 860850, email enquiries@cambsacre.org.uk.

 

Useful contacts

 

Age UK Cambridgeshire and Peterborough
Offers information, services and support and social opportunities
Helpline 0300 6669860
Email: infoandadvice@ageukcap.org.uk
Website: https://www.ageuk.org.uk/cambridgeshireandpeterborough/

 

Alzheimer’s Society Cambridgeshire
Telephone: 0300 222 1122
Email: enquiries@alzheimers.org.uk
Website: https://www.alzheimers.org.uk/

 

Caring Together
Support for family carers across Cambridgeshire, including groups, carers hubs and an emergency planning scheme
Telephone: 0345 241 0954 / 01733 645234
Email: hello@caringtogether.org
Website: https://www.caringtogether.org/

 

Dementia UK
Specialist nursing charity with Admiral Nurses offering free advice and support for families
Helpline: 0800 8886678
Email: info@dementiauk.org
Website: https://www.dementiauk.org/